Nerves, Crazy Dreams, and Russia.

Okay, so I am officially going to Voronezh Russia on the 28th of January! Yes that is only 7 days from now. I am beyond excited to finally be doing something. I have know since Novemberish that I was going to be headed out of the country to teach English in the elementary schools but what I didn't know is how sad the wait to leave was going to be. 

It wasn't bad over Christmas break because I saw friends who were home for the break, and had things to do with family in town. However when we got back from a great week in Wyoming everything went back to normal, no more extravaganzas and everyone went back to normal life but me.

 I am a very social person, being alone is my least favorite part of any day. All of my friends headed back up to school which made it that much harder because I felt as though I was being left behind. Why was I not doing something? I felt like I was the girl who dropped out of school and it's been sad probably because I have had a lot of down time. This seems so silly considering I was going to do something really cool, an experience most people never in their life get to experience. I wanted to go to Russia, and I CHOSE to put off a semester of college. The fact that I even got the choice of going is incredible, hearing these words come out of my mouth they sound very spoiled. I worked very hard to earn money to go and this is what I wanted to happen or it wouldn't have.  While I have been struggling feeling sad about not being in Logan (never thought I would say that).  I am sure this crazy feeling is coming about because of my nerves for doing something completely new, in a country that I don't know that language. 

 I thought about when one of my best friends left on his mission I was happy for him, but very sad he was leaving especially considering I saw him almost every other weekend when I was at school. This guy had been a huge impact on my life and had helped me through some of my biggest trials so far. It was very hard to say goodbye to him. Following the weeks after he left I had dreams about the world ending, and Nick still being in Columbia. My whole family was frantic trying to make it to my Uncle Matt's house which he had conveniently converted into a bullet and zombie proof safe house (if you knew my uncle matt you would know this would not shock you that he could engineer something like that) and my Uncle Todd was desperately trying to get Nick, cause he was still in Columbia. Super scary, Likewise I have had many dreams the past couple nights about the world ending and me being in Russia. Totally beside the point I was trying to make here, lets see back on track...

Oh yeah so  I had to remember that he wanted to go on a mission, and that he CHOSE to go. I was scared of his trek to Columbia, likewise I am beginning to feel the same about my trek to Russia. I will be in a different country, away from what is familiar to me. I will be in a second world country, that does not have the rights, privileges, and accessibility to as much as we do here in the states. Crazy!  Through this whole time of telling people where I am going they have all asked me if i am nervous yet, and I am not completely nervous but it's starting to come about. 

Don't get me wrong I am INCREDIBLY grateful for the opportunity that I have to go to Russia. The fact that I even get to go is so magical, and would not be possible without the support I have gotten from my parents and extended family. I am so nervous, excited and ecstatic about this trip. I know it's going to change the way I look at the world. I know that I am going to come back a more well rounded person.  But boy I am going to miss my family like crazy. I grew up in a home where anything was possible, and I am so grateful at how much I have been blessed.

 I am so beyond excited and hope to be updating my blog quite frequently with experiences I have abroad. Thank you all so much for the love and support. I am so excited, and I know that this is what I am supposed to be doing right now. I am supposed to go to Russia, and the kids I am going to be teaching are going to change me. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. Love you all!



P.S Um how about them BRONCOS BABY!!! WOOO! I am now just praying that ill be able to watch the game in Russia! I am so proud to be a broncos fan!